One of these kids is doing his own thing...

Do you ever look at any of your children and think, "What planet is he from?"  I know that most of us moms would like to see ourselves as unconditionally accepting of our kids.  We love them no matter what.  And we do!  But, please don't tell me that while watching your child participate in a sport, you haven't wondered to yourself, "Is he the most uncoordinated kid out there?  What is he thinking?  What is he doing?"  Of course, we have these thoughts because we think we are athletically gifted on some level and were hoping that our kids would take after us!  :)  It's not always on a field or court.  Sometimes, it's just watching them interact with other kids.  We wonder, "Why does he seem so immature?  Why isn't he engaged in (whatever activity)?  These kids are not going to want to play with him if he keeps acting like this!!!"

Let's take a breath.  I've shared many conversations with moms that have these very thoughts.  I just had a really great conversation with one of my dear friends yesterday about this exact topic.  We want our kids to be the best that they can be.  We want them to thrive at whatever they put their mind and hands to.  We want them to succeed.  We want to give them every opportunity to try whatever they want to.  I think the frustration or concern comes in when we forget what should define our kid's success and happiness.  The measure society uses is very different from what we should be using as parents.  My mom gave me a piece of advice that will always stick with me.  She said, "No one on earth knows what it is like to be the parents of Noah and Demetri besides you and John.  NO ONE knows them like you do.  God gave you stewardship over them." 

She's absolutely right.  John and I are learning the strengths and weaknesses of both of our children.  We will always be learning because they will always grow and change.  I allow society's definition of what I want my children to be doing and how to do it to overshadow what I know to be true about Noah and Demetri.  We should be our kids' greatest cheerleaders.  We should be the first to say, "There is NOTHING wrong with you.  You are perfect and you are more than enough!" 

So what if they pick the grass or fool around during a soccer match? 
So what if they throw a huge and embarassing tantrum at the park? 
So what if they refuse to play nicely and share their toys?
So what if they are the only kid that still has training wheels on his bike?
So what if they pick their nose and...ok, I'll have to stop on that one.  That's just gross.

They are NORMAL kids.  I think we tend to put too much expectation on them.  I know I do.  I realize I have a competetive personality and tend to be an "overachiever".  These traits can be positive in life.  However, when it comes to parenting, I think I need to learn how to harness the power of those character traits in order to accept my children for who God created them to be.  They are fearfully and wonderfully made!  Whatever it is about them that drives us crazy today will likely be the very essence of their being that God uses for His Good.  I believe that our children are hand-picked by God and placed into our lives to teach us precious lessons about ourselves.  I want to learn those lessons.  I know that being a parent is the hardest thing I have ever done, and we're just getting started.  I believe that being a good parent is being a good student.

So, I want to encourage us all to take a step back when those moments of frustration come.  When your kid is out there doin' his own thing, celebrate it!  Let their FREAK FLAG FLY!!!  God only knows that I have plenty of things about myself that are not socially "normal."  Let's meet our kids where they are and every once in a while, be the student.  Let God show us what we are supposed to learn in those moments.  I want to see our children as God sees them.  Perfect. Good.  More than enough.

Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights...James 1:17

I want to close this blog by saying thank you to my friend for sharing her vulnerabilities with me and allowing me a safe place to share mine.  My conversation with her inspired this blog entry.  Being a parent is a difficult job and we need as many people to partner with as we can get.  I appreciate you so much and the insight we can share as sisters.  I am thankful for all the people I can walk with on this journey.  Your friendships and support carry me through the toughest days.  Thank you for not judging me.  Thank you for encouraging me and telling me about all the crazy things your kids do to make me feel better. :) 

And, thank you for loving God and serving Him through loving your children so much.